pathways

you know that point when you see the path you're headed down, and it scares the living shit out of you? i'm there. not because the path i'm headed down is dangerous but because it is so safe. i am not a normal girl. i don't want normal things or expect to lead a normal life, but i see myself going that way. i know i say sometimes that all i want is to be normal, that everything i do is for that...but i never really mean it. i mean to appear normal, i know deep down inside being normal would kill me. the rachel that i am would be dead i would become some sort of zombie. maybe that's for the best though, maybe i should just let myself head down this mellow little path onto soul crushing...or maybe i'll run